*3Some*

yup. hari nih besday ayah. and aku cuti.
so mebe kejap lagi aku naik bas balik kl. kalau aku ada kereta, mebe dah mmg confirm aku balik.

sekarang dah 12.30pm, tapi aku masih atas katil, baca blog babed. aku rase, babed memang pandai menulis. kadang2 bila aku baca blog orang2 yang tulis penuh in sight dan tak merepek, aku rasa, kenape lah aku tulis blog hari2.
gile macam haram isu2 dan pendapat2 aku. aku lagi pandai bercakap dari menulis. that is a fact.

anyway, back to ayah, aku bukan orang yang close sangat dengan ayah. ayah is tipical lelaki melayu. we are not lovey dovey. dulu2 kecik2, aku tgk sheyna berpeluk cium dengan ayah dia, aku rasa pelik. esp bila sheyna cerita dia pi shopping beli baju raya or watever dengan abah, aku tak macam tu. semua benda buat dengan mak ja.

the only thing yang bapak aku akan terlibat dalam hidup aku, is bila bawak pi jalan2 pi penang/bukit kayu hitam/padang besar/ hatnyai/langkawi dan beberapa tahun sekali, KL (haha, itu je tempat bercuti aku dulu2).

ada jugak at one point in my life, i really despise my dad. seriously masa tu aku rasa, ayah tader pon tak pe. owh yeah, that time, i am really bitter. i blame my dad for everything i feel. and i guess the rest of the family also blame my dad. sebab after that, my dad starts to withdraw his authority over my life. he lets me decide everything. if he try to suggest something, i will always lash out back at him.
favourite sentence ” ayah nak, ayah pi la. dik na tak mau”
and that is always the end of the discussion. (haha, seb baik tak kene tampar)

tapi over the years, as i grow older, i think parents always wants the best for their kids. kita yang selalu tak nampak kan.
and i know my dad loves me very much. and i think i love him too. ayah aku dah tua, so sekarang, we, the sisters, always try to hug and kissed him selain dari salam je. i think at first ayah agak macam culture shock dipeluk anak2. but over times, sekarang macam dah memang di expected.

and one think i notice, my ayah treats my mom very well. he always puts my mom first. semua mak lah, buat apa pon sebut mak. which is kind of sweet.

so yeah, aku nak balik KL. esok ada makan2 besday ayah. he’s already 68.
hadiah dah beli.
handphone buat keberapa kali ntah. yang dulu2, aku beli, adik aku pau.
so kali nih, adik aku pon share sekali beli hp. so dia tak pau dah lah balik kot.

but i guess i won’t be able to see any of u. esok aku ingat nak balik sini balik.

hi, meet my puppies, syrup and honey.

****
random updates :

1) i’ve watched He’s just Not That Into You. *heart*
2) i have never read the self-help book on relationship. more importantly never bought one. flip thru pernah lah kot.
3) i always think the rule in relationship is always simple. whether u want or u dont want him/her. the rest can be work out.
4) and now i know, what i think is not true. life is complicated.
5) drew barrymore dah kurus. *sigh*
6) scarlett johansson is very very very sexy. *jealous*
7) Bradley cooper is hot. *drooling*
8) We (read : mebe aku dgn intan je yang tinggal) are the rule, the rest, what ever stories we heard from friends of a friend, are the exception.
9) the rule is simple, if he’s not into you, then he’s not. don’t make excuses for them.
10) haha. i don’t know the rest of the rules, other than what being shown in the movie.

korang pi lah tengok.

i never really love yellow, at least not as much as i love red and pink.

but i guess yellow is actually the color that can make people happy.
yup, today, i’m happy by looking at my feet. (kasut on loan actually)

and this morning, i woke up quite early. and i had the time to think for a while trying hard to delay the time to get up from the bed and get ready for work.

i’ve come up with the list of the things that i love to do in the morning (haha, while terbaring on the bed berangan, yeah ironic). i am the person who believes how u feel in the morning, will affect you the rest of the day. sebab tu aku pantang betul orang menjerit2 kejut aku bangun pagi. hati lembut aku tersentuh dengan jeritan. bisik2 ok.

ok, i would love to wake up in the morning and :
1) semayang subuh. (yeah, mmg lah wajib, tapi aku manusia tak perfect, this is still a struggle for me)
2) pegi joggin for 20minutes. (again, sepanjang 365 hari tahun lepas, aku berjaya buat kurang dari sepuluh hari, read : 3 hari?)
3) buat yoga before mandi
4) breakfast. a super healthy bfast. fruits n yoghurt.
5) tak payah pergi kerje, instead pegi facial/spa/manicure/pedicure. what ever yang tak memerlukan kening berkerut.
6) lazying on the bed. golek2 golek dan bergolek dengan bantal yang banyak. bantal bulu ayam ke bulu itik ke. hoh, kalau boleh bergolek dengan orang yang akan belek je ko, mmg terbaek lah kan. haha.
7) breakfast in bed.
8) morning kiss/cuddle/a quickie? owh forbidden (for me) *wink*
9) swimming kat laut. swimming pool tanak, kecuali kalau pool tu ada heater. laut, tak pe, sejok pon aku sanggup.
10) berbaring atas buaian sambil mendengar bunyi ombak dan membaca buku cerita.

if i am able to do just 3, any 3 of the above, i would consider my morning as perfect.

so, this friday, i’m on leave. i’ll try my best to make it a perfect morning, and hopefully it will turn out to be a perfect day as well.

at the moment, aku ada butterfly in my tummy, terbang merewang2, aku still postpone satu bende i should haf told my boss, but i still don’t have the courage. today is not a very good day to get scolded.

comment sheyna kat entry dia membuatkan aku berpikir.

lagi sepuluh tahun, ape siot jadik kat aku kalau umur panjang.

at least, when i was 15, i know in 10 more years, i would surely work and earn my own money, and be an engineer. yup, i always know after giving up on being an architect, engineer is the job for me.
and i guess, when i was 25, i really is doing some engineering work, walaupon hanyalah terlibat dgn2 kerja2 tengok cable dan tiang2 telepon.

so now, i really2 don’t know what will i be in 10 years time.
will i be richer?
will i be prettier? (haha, guess not, i’m not benjamin button)
what kind of car will i drive? adakah still aliph. gile lah, lagi sepuluh tahun pon bawak aliph. mmg setia sangat.

will i still work with the company?

i think the question is not what i will be, it’s what i want to be.

i don’t know what i want for myself anymore. dunno what is best. i should have known that sometimes, what is best for others, might not be good for me. so maybe certain people are meant to raise children dan meramaikan umat manusia.
but i’m not? sebab aku bukan lah seorang manusia yang pencinta kanak2 or alam sekitar sangat.
i try to picture myself having my own business, but i can’t. i’m not passionate about anything at the moment.

so, i guess i still have at least 10 more years to figure out what i want to be? while orang lain masa tu, akan ada anak umur 15 tahun?
haha.
okey, that sounds funny.

or commonly known as Quad bike.

tetibe, aku rase sempena penghujung umur dua puluhan, rakan2 aku menjadik lebih adventurous.
padahal, dulu2, OARS tu bukan lah kelab yang diminati semasa berada di menara gading. masa tu, lebih berminat kepada activity2 lepak dan membesarkan bontot bagi perempuan, dan membesarkan perot kepada yang lelaki.
jangan harap nak beractivity yang tidak perlu berpakaian cantik atau menyebabkan baju2 menjadik comot.

tapi kali nih, mari kite bermain ATV. apa itu ATV. baca sendiri kat Wike.
but in short, kalau malas setadi, ( aku tau, tader kuase nak baca pasal bende2 tade pekdah nih), ATV adalah kenderaan merentas desa? dimana boleh naik sehingga ke tempat2 air terjun dan jugak masuk lumpur2.
ermm but i’m wondering, adakah perlu menolak bike ini sekirenye lekat dalam lumpur?
anyway ini adalah rupenye. owh yes, dia beroda empat. so kepada sesiapa yang tidak mempunyai lesen motor, jangan risau, anda mampu menunggang bike ini. (owh aku tau bagong n aku tader lesen. but intan ade lesen motor ok! heh, sheyna mmg cfm rempit zaman2 remaja dulu. haha)

tapi kalau lebih ganas, mebe boleh buat aksi ini.

jom pegi ATV kat Kemensah. adakah mampu kite nak naik 7 tier waterfall?

note : to sheyna, u should haf comment at this blog now. pakai bb bagong pliss.
:P

as much as i love being in KL, to have all the freedom to drive around, being with family and friends, to eat what ever i feel like eating, hanging out at the mapley until 1am enjoying teh-o-ais kurang manis without having to worry whether i’ll be too late to catch the MRT and need to pay overly priced taxi fare.

despite all the fun that i have in KL, quite surprisingly i look forward to go back to singapore today.
i actually missed my 2bedrooms flat.
my home. my room. my bed. my pillow and my tv.
after a year, that is a place i can call home, other than alor setar.

so girls and boys, don’t miss me too much. i’ll be back in march i guess.

next time i’m back, we wanna go ATV right? bagong will be the event planner kan.

additional note :
aku ada satu symptom bila nak balik singapore or berada di sana, aku tak lalu makan. start dari tadi lunch, aku makan nasik goreng aku order tak sampai separuh. most likely aku makan suku je nasik tu. mebe korang2 sape nak diet, patut gi duduk dua bulan dgn aku kat singapore, confirm kurus. haha. walaupon aku tak kurus dalam masa dua bulan.

and, yes bagong, kejap lagi aku karang entry ATV sementara bosan kat KLIA. tujuan asal online nak reply email keje (yes, i’m suxx). but rase lagi fun pulak buat entry kat blog. haha.

kadang2, benda2 kecik jadik dalam hidup nih, yang sebenarnya kalau difikirkan, taklah penting, tapi mampu membuatkan kita senyum, kalau pon bukan dua tiga hari, at least at that exact moment, yang mebe hanya bertahan selama dua minit.

these are the things that made me smile.

1) tol kereta anda di bayar oleh kereta depan, di mana kereta depan adalah stranger. ( mebe nak mengorat or sebelum tu aku tgh merempit bersama keretanya)
2) bila nak bayaq makanan, tiba2 makanan anda di bayaq oleh seorang apek yg kelihatan seperti kontraktor. and dia bukan attempt nak mengorat. mmg tiba2 agaknya dia rasa nak belanja.
3) seorang kenalan yang agak boleh untuk diexcitedkan (read : bujang dan boleh tahan), tiba2 mengejar lift yg aku ada didalamnya, walaupon niatnya mebe btol semata2 nak kejar lift, tapi tak kisah lah, aku tersengih jugak, sebab aku perasan dia kejar aku. because he does not seem surprise to see me inside the lift. confirm dia nampak aku from parking. haha. and dia puji aku kurus. mmg confirm double smile.
4) dapat bunga rose yang tak disangka from seorang girlfriend pada hari kasih sayang
5) each and every time i saw his name on my mobile (incoming call), things as simple as that really do made me smile. yeah, i’m easy to please.
6) bila a stranger, (male) hold the door for me.

i guess this world is not such a bad and miserable place to live in. the unexpected things and a suprise here and there sometimes do make our life a lil bit more interesting.
*hihi*

can we have it all in our life?
for once, i don’t think i can.

i am at this point of my life, where i’m thinking, this will be all that i’m getting in my life. nothing more, and hopefully nothing less.

no, i don’t lose faith in God. i just lost faith in me.

and it’s not that i’m sad. my life is definitely not at it’s lowest point at the moment. i’m doing fine in everything, but it is just i don’t think i’ll be better.. can’t even imagine my life will be different in 1 year time. i guess next year, everything will be pretty much the same. same ol same ol.

yeah,i guess this may be just a phase. (phase of feeling helpless?)
when i look around, and i see that other people are changing.. i get scared. esp when i can’t spot any different with my life. 80% of my life now is still the same 6 years back.
i really have the feeling to shot my own head just now, when i still have the same conversation, same topic as i had done 6-7 years ago, only the person that i’m having that conversation with has changed.
other people has move on to something else. different issues. i’m still stuck. it feels as if i have not been able to graduate, while other people are already taking PHD.

yup. for the first time in my life, i am jealous.

even though this entry is a bit late, but i know i am still on the exact day, aku tak backdate entry ok.

so Happy birthday Babed.
sorry that aku lupe nak call semalam.

aku agak lost track dgn tarikh.

and i know this year would definitely filled with lots of joy and marks few of your special occasion.

so babe. Haf a very happy birthday. hari sabtu malam, kalau ko tader valentines dinner specially with your fiance, jom lah kite dinner. aku nak cakap aku nak belanje, but aku agak sengkek bulan nih..
haha.
but jom lah dinner.

muahs!

XOXO

notes: hehe, babed emo dgn aku. serious babed, kalau birthday boifren sendiri pon aku boleh terlupe on the day itself . so maafkan lah aku, bila aku terlupe birthday ko. kasih sayang aku tak diukur dgn tahap ingatan aku pada hari jadi. haha. aku ingat ko hari2.
:)

Got an AK-47, well you know it makes me feel alright
Got an Uzi by my pillow, helps me sleep a little better at night
There’s no feeling any greter
Than to shoot first and ask questions later
Now I’m trigger happy, trigger happy every day

Event : Paint ball war at Putra Paintball, kampung limau manis, desa pinggiran putra.
Even director : Amir Imran *ClapClap* (berjaya dowh)
participant : 15, 4 boys, 11 girls
audience : 2 (1 boy, 1 girl, owh and lil baby in the tummy. hihi)
teams :
Team Satria Baja Hitam :

Kesatria2 : amir, waque, maya, angah, koala, sheyna, intan, (first 3 games, berg is in this team)

Team Ultraman Taro :

Taro2 : bagong, bigg, hasna, ain, babed, ira, warie. (berg later join this team)

*****************************************

favourite quote :
one day prior

waque : aku tak trigger happy dowh, hari tu aku main, dapat unlimited pellet, aku tembak tak sampai 30.

*******************

hasna : tader sape ke tertembak team member sendiri?
bigg : a ah, tadi aku perasan gak hasna from belakang, rasa gak nak tembak tapi macam kesian
hasna : *agak blushed* (dalam hati, chitott lah bigg nihhhhh) hahahaa

*******************

waque : pinggang aku yang 20inch nih pon tak berjaya siot nak berlindung bali pokok.

*******************
Game :
1) padang ape ntah nama dia.

(amir and waque bersungguh nak capture the flag. ke waque nak ngorat ira ntah? )

Season 1, 1st Episode : Cinta Panahan Petir

aku kena tembak dulu, dan mati. tak sempat aku nak fire, dari kejauhan amir dah tembak kaki aku, yg tak berjaya dilindungi belakang tong sepenuhnya.
team Satria menang mudah. walaupon ira berjaya membuat kejutan dgn bersembunyi di belakang tong senyap2.

Season 1, 2nd Episode : Awan Terpilu
aku dah pandai, sembunyi seluruh badan belakang tong. dan tembak bertubi2. dari kejauhan, aku berjaya tembak sheyna. haha. aku tak mati kali nih, tapi abis peluru. (100 sekali main, gile power)
again, team satria menang. sekali lagi, player terakhir tinggal team ultraman adalah ira. otai ok ira, berjaya tembak waque. (btol tak?)

****************************
2) Padang kedua : the cabaret.

Season 2, 1st Episode : Bola Bola Api
Team ultraman yang macam agak sayur, terpaksa mengimport berg. haha.
kemudian bermulah lah perang bersungguh2. this game, bigg is the hero. bersungguh dia tembak sampai habis peluru, terpaksa aku pass senapang marker aku, lepas aku dah mati. mmg hebat, tembak orang dalam keadaan meniarap. macho duh,
team ultraman menang kan?

Season 2, 2nd Episode : Cinta Beralih Arah
tukar side.
this time, agak menerima serangan bertubi2 dari team kesatria. at one point, maya tembak aku bertubi2. terpaksa aku diam sensorang semunyi belakang dinding ape ntah. tiba2 aku dengar bunyi ada orang lari sandar btol2 belakang aku.aku hanya mampu cakap ” omg omg omg”
fuh.. pas tu aku bangun serentak dgn orang belakang aku tu, senapang to each other. tapi seb baik aku teringat dekat sangat tak boleh nak fire, terpaksa sembunyi balik, tapi malangnya aku dah kena tembak dgn maya.
but that was really something agak membuatkan jantung aku hampir nak berenti. takut dowhh.. macam mmg suku lagi nak mati.

Season 2, Season Finale : Dendam Kesumat dibawa ke Mati

kiteorg main, kalau mati, boleh hidup balik. haha. sebab nak abih kan peluru ja. suma orang pakat nak aim waque. waque keji siot.
tembak berg di leher, dan di panggil love bite. ah ah ah. berg kene mark dgn waque.

so this time, mmg aku mati ada lah 5 kali, aku rasa 5 dari nya is from waque. macam haram. tembak aku tanpa henti. aku dah kena pon dia aim aku lagi, sambil t4embak from lubang zinc. haram muka dia tak nampak langsung.

towards the end, tinggal aku berg n warrie , n amir n waque je yg peluru tak abih. mmg terbaek.

haha. amir kene tembak bertubi2 dgn aku n berg.

pas tu, warrie selambak tembak waque dalam senyap. last sekali, berg berlari, ambush waque, menggelabah adik marshal yang cute tu kejar, dia mmg ingat berg nak tembak waque sungguh2 dari jarak dekat kot. haha.

anyway, kiteorg lah kot menang, berjaya capture the flag.

******************************

after effect :

aku tak lah parah sangat.

all in all, sangat successful. kudos to the vent manager. ada hiccup few and there, initially masa nak carik jalan. but once we started to play, everything went smoothly.

amir dah tanya, bila second game?
:P